Let it begin...

I love this picture.  So perfect, so clean, so off the floor.  Love that!

The swim bags are "locked and loaded" with flippers, towels, goggles and everything else you can think of.  The kids are anxious to get back into the water.  They have had exactly three days off from swimming and you would think that it has been months and months. 

Our summer swim team will begin on Monday, and for the first time we will have three swimming on the swim team.  Yeah!!!  Our little girl has worked extremely hard for months and months to become efficient in her strokes and can't wait to finally participate in a swim meet...instead of watching from the sidelines. 

For her father and I, we're all for it.  The more events we can watch, the less painful it will seem to sit through 6 hours of a swim meet.  Although, it doesn't make it any less anxious for me.  For I'm one of those parents who screams their head off for their kid (last or first...doesn't matter), even though they're two feet under the water and probably can't hear you...but I like to hope that they can.

The kids will be in the water by 7:30 in the morning which leaves a wonderful predicament for me...down to one child.  I have decided that I'm going to put the smallest one in the child watch at the gym and work out alone for the first time....EVER! 

When you have four kids you do have to get a little "creative" with any type of workout that you might want to do.  If I want to run, usually I have to push the little one in the jogger - ugh! - and have one riding the bike.  (The older ones usually run with their Dad who is WAY faster than me)  If I do an exercise video, then usually I have an audience who participates with it as well...not always the best. 

So, for the first time, I'm going to be alone, without someone, all by myself, foot loose and fancy free...okay, you get my drift.  And I am excited.

We call him Jumpy...

...but the more he eats out of our bird feeder, we're going to have to call him


...Plumpy

Ye-oooowwwwww!!!!!....

I got the notion yesterday to really clean up my dining room.  I mean, really clean.  Why, oh why, I'll never know.  If you were to see my house right at this very moment, it has what I like to call.."the lived-in look".  It's not that it's gross or stinky or clutter free...nope, definitely not that.  But we have four kids, home school and for my sanity's sake it's just not something I stress about too much.  But sometimes it just gets to me and then I get...a notion.

So after I had vacuumed, mopped, cleaned and dusted up the entire room I left the chairs out in the entryway so I could stand their in awe at the beautiful glistening room.  Oh, just look at it sparkle.  Wow!  Then I turned around to leave the room....

....hit the leg of one of the chairs with a toe on my foot

...and broke it...the toe that is

That's what I get for getting a notion to clean.

I have lost my magic powers...

Never in all my life have I had poison ivy....until now.  I have had the chicken pox TWICE, but never had poison ivy...until now.  I have hit a bat with my car antenna, but have never gotten poison ivy...until now.  I have been on a game show, but never had poison ivy...until now.  I have broken my nose, but never had poison ivy...until now.  I have been stitched up so many times that I lost count, but never had poison ivy...until now.

Basically, I'm telling you that never in my entire crazy life have I gotten poison ivy...until now.  And there is one thing I am absolutely certain of.  That poison ivy was created by the devil himself.  UGH!!!  Chicken pox might be better than this...okay, I take that back.  The pox would be worse...especially if it were your THIRD time to have it. 

My husband just laughs at me, I mean, considering the very small rash I have on both arms/elbows.  He's had it all his life.  He's one of those people who can "look" at poison ivy and then starts itching.  But me, until now...I could just squeak past that gosh awful plant and nothing would happen. 

What is happening in the world????  Has the earth begun to rotate backwards????  I have lost my magic powers.  Ahhhhhh!!!!!!!.....

Maybe my husband has stolen them...

Happy Mother's Day, here's your fire truck...

Most people get flowers for Mother's day, or even chocolate.  Some might even get a great outfit or tickets to a play.  But my kids reach for the stars...and got me a fire truck.  Yep, complete with a 75 foot ladder and expandable hose.  Yep, my kids are the best.  Poor Daddy, I guess he'll have to get a police car or something else like that for Father's Day, since I got the fire truck for Mother's Day.  Thanks kiddos...

Actually....

Here's how our afternoon played out....

After church services, we did some shopping at Costco and had just come home.  While I was fixing lunch our smoke alarms started going off in our house.  Since all of our smoke alarms are hard wired the entire house started going off...EXTREMELY LOUD. 

Immediately, my husband took off down to the basement while I ran upstairs to check things out.  Neither one of us found anything wrong and since all of our windows were open we knew that nothing smelled out of the ordinary.  So we were very puzzled at this point.

This went on for a long time...and if you haven't heard smoke alarms lately for a while, they are quite painful to hear over and over and over and over and over and over...(you get the idea).

That's when I thought I would call the fire department.  "Hello, fire department.  Um, yes, I have a little issue with my fire alarms going off...but don't worry I'm not standing in a house that's on fire so don't panic.  Just one that is telling me it's on fire, but don't worry it's just fibbing.  (long pause, here)  Yes, I'm okay.  Just was wondering if you could tell me what would cause fire alarms to go off.  You know, other than say a fire.  Wind wouldn't do it, because we have all our windows open.  Surely not, that would be crazy, right?  (another long pause)  Yes, it's still going off.  I'm sorry, I really hate to bother you with this but I just didn't know who to call.  No, no, no.  No, need to come here.  Isn't there a button we can push or a battery we can take out?  Okay, I understand.  But we'll just keep it really casual right?  Kind of like, going out for a Sunday drive...except to my house.  Okay, see you in five minutes.

And that's when I realized that my Sunday drive and their Sunday drive are COMPLETELY different.  Mine would not include a monster size fire truck complete with a 75 foot ladder.  But the kiddos had thought they hit the jackpot.  Because when it was all said and done, the kids got to climb aboard the fire truck and get their own personal tour.




In the end, I have to buy all new smoke alarms...oh goodie, goodie gum drops, just what I always wanted for Mother's day...along with my fire truck. 

Therapy...

Today I dug up my garden.  Not with a tiller, but the old fashion way...with a shovel and a hoe.  To me, it's therapy really.  I realize that saying something like that probably seems like a really need the other kind of therapy...you know, the kind you laid down on a couch and talk away. 

But let's face it...that's just not me.  I much rather prefer to have some time alone and work in the dirt. I do a lot of thinking when I work in the garden.  Great things have aspired from amidst the tomatoes.  Of course, so has my many blunders...but we'll put them with the yucky brussel sprouts area. 

I love that you can work for hours and in the end see what you have accomplished.  Of course, the older I get I not only "see" what I have accomplished, I also "feel" it something fierce in all the muscles I forgot I had. 

Still...it's therapy to me

I love...

...freshly cut grass in the spring
...the way the house feels with all the windows open
...the sound of the birds singing outside
...garage sale season
...digging up my garden
...all the laundry being done
...dinner cooking in the oven
...the color blue (any shade)
...the way my kids laugh and giggle
...phone calls with my Mom
...doing school outside
...the wind blowing through the trees
...the way my husband still looks at me after 20 years
...being outside
...cooking
...flowers blooming (any kind)
...a completely clean house - all three floors (but if I'm being serious here...that never happens)
...shorts, t-shirts and flip-flops
...not having anywhere you need to be
...music playing while I'm cooking
...the warmth of the sun on my face
...everyday with my family...sounds corny I know, but I just adore them all

...and that's when I just glazed over

Anyone who knows me, knows that I love to cook...no scratch that...adore cooking.  Call it a passion that has come out of a necessity.  You see, my husband cannot cook.  Well, he "thinks" he can cook, but really when you order take out, I don't think you can consider that "cooking". 

This past weekend we were in Omaha for a family getaway and decided to do some shopping while we were there.  Naturally, I got lost in the the "kitchen department" while everyone else waited patiently.  I was looking for a Kitchen Aid food processor.  I have been going through hand held choppers like crazy and finally wanted something a bit more sturdy. 

It was at this time that a lady approached me wearing a Kitchen Aid apron asking me if I had any questions.  Duh, yeah....  Have you ever looked at all the different options of food processors?  Trust me, there are a lot.  After a few minutes of talking with her, I asked her how she knew so much about all of these different kitchen gadgets.  "Oh, I have all of them", she explained.  "What?"  "Well, because I have to demonstrate how all of these work, they let me keep them."

...and that's when it happened

"They... let... you... keep... them...", I said slowly savoring every word.   "Are you okay?" She looked at me a little concerned.  "They... let... you... keep... them..."  "Of course, it's all part of my job." 

...and that's when I just glazed over

One breath...

...my little boy walks into the kitchen

"Mom, what is for lunch?  What are you making?  Why do you need that spoon?  Wait, did you hear that noise?  Mom, do you?  Where is the dog?  Why does she lay down right there?  Wait, there is that noise again, you hear it?  Do you?  Mom, why are you not answering?  Do you hear me?  I can't hear you..."  He looks away for a moment.

Two breaths...

"Mom, I was wondering about that dog in the movie?  What was his name?  What was the cat's name?  Oh, he was so funny, don't you think so?  Are you still making lunch?  You stopped, do you want to ask me a question?  Why are you looking at me so funny?  What's so funny?  Why are you laughing?  Where is everyone?"  He stops to look down the hallway.

Three breaths...

"Mom, I'm hungry when do we eat?  What are you making?  Can I help you?  Where did the dog go?  I didn't hear her leave, did you?  I like having the windows open, don't you?  I'm hot, can I have some juice?  Are we swimming today?  I like swimming, don't you?  I'm hungry, are you done yet?  I'm going to go to the basement to play with everybody, okay?"  He walked to the basement door.

Four breaths...


...I...may...not...make...it...through...the..."threes".... 

Help...my new washer is having a complex problem

Right before the kids and I left for Dallas our washing machine broke...I mean completely died, would not come on, light up, spin...you get the idea.  Rather than spend a boatload of money to fix the problem, my husband and I decided to go ahead and buy a new washer.  Oooo, I just tingle with delight at that thought.   A new washer...a new fancy, smancy, much larger washer.  Yeah!!! 

Well, we went out the very next day to buy one and it was delivered the week we were in Dallas.  For reasons better left unsaid, my husband had strict rules not to touch or start the washer, much less look at it...okay, he "could" look at it...but seriously, he was never going to go in there and gaze in awe at it.  That was my job when I returned. 

Fast forward to now and I am learning very quickly that my new washer has a complex problem.  It wants very much so to be a musical instrument.  At the very end of the cycle, it doesn't  buzz, clink or even ding out like a normal washing machine.  Nope.  It plays a musical tune with 7 pages, 96 measures and a big brass band accompanying it in the background.  Alright...minus the band. 

But...it does play a tune.  I found someone had posted the same song on YouTube so here you go...enjoy the new musical instrument I have in my house.

...here's hoping my grand piano doesn't get jealous

I don't hear a thang...ya'll

I have been told..."maybe once or twice"...that I have a Southern accent.  Yes, it's true, I was born and raised in the South.  But now I live in Iowa and it seems to be more and more frequently that people ask me where I'm from. 

I say "Iowa"...they say..."no, really, where?"  "Iowa".  I'm pretty smart in that regards...I know where I live.  Then they say..."okay, but where were you born?"  Yeah, that really makes a difference, because them thar babies come out just a talkin' away.  Don't they?  Really, an accent?  I just don't hear it.

I mean, I get a few looks when I tell my kids to stop lollygagging with the dawg and get in L.I.I.N.E and skid-daddle out to the car.  Or com'on back here and get-r-done.  But really...smatterwhichyou, I don't hear a thang when it comes to accents, ya'll. 

(By the way, my spell check is broken on this blog, because when I went to check this post...a whole bunch of yella tar-neigh-shion just lit up all over the place - go figure...)